The Negativity Diet: Shedding Your Brain Fat

   With the presidential election only days away, we've all been subjected to a tidal wave of negative ads, negative news, negative comments on social media, and negative banter between co-workers, friends, and family. It's enough to make you go to bed in a foul mood and have no idea why, then all you have to do is wake up and turn on the TV or log onto Facebook, and there it is, staring at you in the face again. I suspect it will only increase until election day, but it certainly won't go away afterward, so it might just be time for a diet. The Negativity Diet.

   Many of us pay close attention to what we are feeding our bodies, but how much attention do we pay to what we're feeding our minds? Getting sucked into negative discussions, vicious rumors and smear campaigns is like eating at McDonald's for breakfast, lunch, and dinner--and it doesn't just hold true for politics. Engaging in gossip, watching certain reality TV, and reading the tabloids is more mind pollution, or what I call "brain fat," that's poisoning your life and your happiness. The problem is that most of the time you aren't even conscious of it.

  The brain is constantly processing billions of bits of information, sifting through data and making sense of the world around it. We may not realize that when we subject ourselves to an avalanche of negativity that we are gorging our brains on crap, and our moods and our lives will inevitably reflect that. It is always your choice what to feed your brain, and it's easy to tell if it's junk food. If it leaves you feeling drained, sluggish, moody, anxious, or angry for no reason, then you need to put it down or turn it off and start feeding your brain something that will supercharge it. It's easier than you think.

  Here are my personal Top 10 Super Foods to feed your brain:

  1) Meditation or deep breathing
  2) Make a list of what you're grateful for
  3) Read an uplifting or inspiring book
  4) Listen to relaxing music
  5) Go for a walk outside and focus on nature
  6) Turn off the news or talk radio
  7) Exercise, go for a run, or go lift weights
  8) Let go of resentment or mend an old relationship
  9) Tell someone you love them

 ...and #10 is my special bonus "Election 2012" Negativity Diet tip: We've all been inundated with Facebook messages from people who don't share our political beliefs, and because of this a lot of "de-friending" has been going on. If you just find their comments annoying, and not something worth de-friending them for, you can stop their comments from appearing in your news feed. Go to their page and click on the box on the right hand side that says "Friends," just under their cover photo. Then you'll see a check mark next to "show in newsfeed," and all you have to do is uncheck it.
 Simple as that.

  This works particularly well for family members who have differing political views. With Thanksgiving right around the corner, it's really best not to de-friend your own kin. A little newsfeed censorship never hurt anyone, and it will eliminate any awkward moments while taking the coats to put on the bed or passing the cranberry sauce.

  Negativity isn't going to vanish after this election is over, but now is a great time to be conscious of what you're feeding your mind. Is it healthy, pure, inspiring, and energizing? Or is is negative, draining, and corrosive to your well being? If it's not serving you, you can always change it. Sure, it's great to be informed on worldly events, but that doesn't mean you have to be inundated with bad news, which is like feeding trans fat to your brain. Begin the Negativity Diet today, try my TOP 10 super foods, and in no time the brain fat will start melting away.

How Do You Want To Be Remembered?

 During a deep philosophical discussion in my late 20s, a friend once asked me, "Dave, how do you want to be remembered?" I'd never really thought about it before and the question caught me off guard, so there was a slight pause before I answered, "Uhh...I dunno....hopefully a long time from now?" We both had a laugh at my answer, but when I deflected the question back at him, it was clear that he had given it some real thought. I always considered that a question reserved for famous athletes, Hollywood actors, or past presidents, but I started to realize it's something we all deserve to ask ourselves. In fact, maybe we're obligated to ask.

                
                Ever more people today have the means to live, but no meaning to live for.
                 ~Viktor Frankl


 As human beings, we all yearn for meaning. We want meaning in our work, meaning in our relationships, meaning in our memories, and meaning in our lives. The meaning of each may change and evolve, but the need to attach meaning is constant. It's something we do subconsciously, without even thinking, so we get stuck with our default thoughts and categorizations, and then we immediately begin to accept them as truth. Think how easy it is to believe that work sucks, my relationship is going nowhere, my past is haunting me, and life is a bitch. Are these things really true? Or have we just repeated them in our minds so often that they feel like the truth? It doesn't matter, because whatever the story of your life may be, it is never too late to change it.


   Get out a piece of paper and write down 10 things you'd like to be remembered for. No one has to see this list but you. How would you like to be remembered as a father? A mother? A daughter? A son? An employee? An employer? A husband? A wife? A teacher? A mentor? A caregiver? An example? A companion? An activist? A sports fan? A nature lover? A car buff? A stamp collector?
The list is endless, there are no right or wrong answers, and it will give you more clarity on how you'd like to be remembered, and more importantly, how you'd like to live. You may be shocked to realize what is really important to you, but the list won't lie. If you write it down, there's a reason for it. This is a great tool for digging out what you really care about, when it so easily gets covered up by everyday life.

  When I look back at that guy in his late 20s, I know that I wanted meaning in my life. But now that I'm in my 40s, with a wife and two kids, that desire has only increased. Life no longer seems like an endless road sprawling out before me, but I value each moment much more than ever, and that's a trade off that I'm completely cool with. I've also learned to be proactive and attach the meaning to things that I want them to have, without letting subconscious thoughts or fleeting emotions do it for me. You can't choose all of the events in your life, but how you perceive them and what you do about them is always your choice.

   As  a person who loves to asks questions, a question is like "How Do You Want To Be Remembered?" is just too juicy for me not to ponder. The answer may change and evolve, but I think it's a great question to ask yourself on a regular basis. I know the answer would have been different in my 20s, but if I have to answer today, I'd like to be remembered as someone who helps other people figure out what they'd like to be remembered for.

To Improve every area of your life, remember to S.H.I.F.T.

  If you feel like something is missing from your life or that there's an area that could use come improvement, remember the acronym "S.H.I.F.T." SHIFT represents the  5 main areas of importance in your life: Spirit, Health, Intellect, Freedom, and Teamwork. Take a few minutes and rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 in each area--1 being terrible and 10 being phenomenal. When you're done, you will have a much better idea of what areas to focus on improving to give your life more balance. Keep in mind, you're not comparing yourself to other people, you are only determining how you feel about each area of your own life.

  Here's a brief description of what each of them means to you:

Spirit: your connection to the intangible beauty of life. Your appreciation for art, music, and nature.
Your level of gratitude for all of the good in your life. Your ability to quiet your mind or meditate. Your connection and relationship to a higher power. Spirit can be any or all of these things.

On a scale of 1 to 10, I feel like a _______________


Health: Your body's overall well being. Your level of energy. Your ability to be active and enjoy life physically.

On a scale of 1 to 10, I feel like a _______________


Intellect: Your mental and emotional well being. Your continued interest in learning and challenging your mental faculties. Your desire to experience new things, even if they take you out of your comfort zone.

On a scale of 1 to 10, I feel like a _______________


Freedom: You ability to engage in the activities that you most enjoy. The amount of financial freedom you have to purchase things you want and do the things you'd like to do. Your ability to take  control of your own life and make your own decisions.

On a scale of 1 to 10, I feel like a _______________


Teamwork: Your relationship with your spouse or significant other. Your relationship with your children.Your ability to work with co-workers, employer, or employees. Your relationship with family and friends.


On a scale of 1 to 10, I feel like a _______________


Once you rate yourself honestly you will have a good idea of which areas you're doing well in, and which could use some improvement. The key is that you can never neglect any of them. Give them all the attention they deserve and you will be able to transform your life. We can all use a little SHIFT every once in a while.